cuddly love.

"how many couples do you know who have been married for 58 years and still cuddle?"

said my sweet patient as he cried to me missing his wife. he was so devastated that he had to put her in a nursing home, but at 77 years old he just could not take care of her anymore. he had just had his second shoulder surgery from injuring it trying to care for her.

i told him "i'm sure you wife loves you so much, i'm sure you are so sweet to her."

"oh she does, whenever i visit her the very first thing she says to me is that she loves me."

sweet, sweet, sweet.

dan& i will be one of those couples who are married for 50 years and still cuddle. it's one of our daily staples already. i would say along with brushing our teeth but sometimes i forget to do that. never forget to cuddle:].


paradise lost. &found!

life is fun.

dan is taking a shakespearean literature class and a human development class. that means he is reading spicy tales written by perverted men who are long past. and he comes home with all sorts of fun facts about birthing processes/questions about menopause. it's quite entertaining [for myself more than him i think].

we watched a water birthing video...

i have been fully soaking up my few days off work, i needed it soo much! we've been swimming, shopping [SHOPPING!!!! more to come later on that], returning all our wedding plates since they were chipped & getting MORE!, thrifting our hearts away, cleaning, cooking, smoothies, mutual activities, renovating our bathroom, organizing our closet {that was a chore of a chore of a chore}, saw inception at the MOVIE THEATRE (first movie we've seen in the theatre since thanksgiving). we L O V E D that movie! so good. it really just bamboozled our minds and we have to see it again, for sure.

[ps: everyone register for your wedding at bedbath&beyond. why? they will return ANYTHING and give you cash back if it is off your registry. so we returned our plates, got cash back, &looked around for new plates. we decided we would wait because we weren't sure for sure. we went to treasure hunt {best-EST store ever, for reals} and found the EXACT SAME PLATES we were going to buy at BBB for 1/2 the price. and if they ever chip or we need to return them we can go back to BBB! shrewd, very shrewd...]

we've finally caught up on the office. [we had missed spots so we had to start over at season one episode one... and we are finally up to the new ones] cutest show. we are the biggest fans. pop some popcorn &we are the happiest little cuddling souls.

we had the sister missionaries & elders over for dinner on sunday. can you say pot roast/carrots/onions/mashed potatoes?! it was delish. we enjoyed debuting our new green plates. i made gravy from the pot roast &even made a RUE. who knew? i do now.

random post of our little lives.


floras on my feet.

quick craft to make my feet feel a little fancier. [these flowers are from the decor at my bridal shower!] i already got a compliment on them from a middle-aged black man at the pool. :]




life is lucious.

i did once have a patient named "lucious."

okay, i'm trying soo hard to not violate HIPAA here... but there are some things i just MUST share. if you feel that i am violated HIPAA in any way... please notify me so i can quickly delete &not be terminated.

quick overview of a couple of my patients:

1. dx: psychosis
[&more medical things that are unrelated at this time]

2. dx: psychosis

did i accidently get a job at a mental health facility and not notice? our hospital is connected [literally, through swinging doors] to a mental health facility. that means when they get medically unstable or anything they decide they don't wan to handle anymore, they send them on over to us.

that means my sweet little job is to change the bed [the entire bed: fitted sheet, draw sheet, green pads, blue pads, diaper, gown, sheet, blanket, abdominal binder] of a 6'2, 200 lb man [#2] who has so sweetly requested orange juice and then decided to stick his thumb through the styrofoam cup so his bed could enjoy the orange juice too... while he is IN the bed? did i mention his arms and feet are tied to the bed and his hands are in mittens? did i mention he is hooked up to an IV and also has a very easily fiddled with tube coming out of his stomach? did i mention he thrashes uncontrollably and grabs at us and yells out things like "sexual harassment!" [while i am so calming trying to check his blood sugar] or "hookers! chinese hookers! black hookers! ugly hookers!" or "one zillion, one zillion, one zillion" [repeated approxiamately one zillion time] or "bomb! bomb! atomic bomb! you gotta get out! there's gonna be a bomb!" [that one was his particular favorite].

my job indeed. stressful. fulfilling.

let me be the first to say i earn my money.




there is no way to describe the inspiration & awe that color brings to me. just color, something so intricate in our daily lives, but if used right can alter your world and the feelings it puts inside you.

my apartment was constructed in the 1950's. the architecture/design is somewhat puzzling. massive living room& green bean sized hallway kitchen. ceiling fan and light above the kitchen table, no fan/absolutely no lighting in the massive living room. only a miniature window that very insufficiently lights up our little dwelling.

disclaimer: i am not complaining, i am simply planning &dreaming. i love our little place. there is just one things that particularly erks me...

the lack of light. we have two lamps in our living room, yet i am still shocked with the dungeon-esque aspects i encounter when i swing open the door after being out in the light of the sun. there have often been times we have people over &i am frantically turning on every light in the house trying to help the situation, to no avail.

our rexburgian abode had an entire side of the house made simply of windows&doors with beautiful green trees on the other side; i miss miss miss miss MISS. there is something about natural light that ignites my senses. artificial light can not hold... a candle.

how lovely would you feel perched on this little chair pondering life? [because that is surely what you would do in room like this:]

the light&color makes me just feel so light & fluffy in the happiest sort of way. we are not in the position to paints the walls of our apartment, we can not bust out any walls and add windows, i am trying to figure out how to brighten my little place.

my current ideas:

:: paint our currently black TV stand red [or something other beautifully bright shade]

:: bright pillows on our brown leather couches

:: prints on the walls, i like these:


nurse robot health nut

my job is taxing. a certain kind of busy i think you can really only understand if you have worked as a floor nurse. it is emotionally and physically draining.

wednesday night was one of those nights were i literally did not stop for 10 hours [you realize that i literally do mean literally, right?] i had nine patients, one drug seeker [this is a more politically correct way to say drug addict] who was receiving 25 mg of Demerol every 2 hours, until he so dramatically put on his show and i was forced to call the doctor at 0400 and request additional pain medication. he was then receiving 50 mg Demerol every 2 hours [on the minute too, he watched the clock], and he has a Dilaudid PCA pump, receiving the max dose possible. i would quietly open his door and sneak in the room (so to wake/disturb as little as possible). as soon as he saw me he would start moaning and grimacing. then the second i would leave he would stop [i maybe waited by the door listening to check his intentions]. at the end of the night he told me i was a good nurse, this is one of those times i don't really appreciate the compliment. i understand that he was in pain, but it is hard giving drugs to a drug addict. it just does not feel right. it's not why i became a nurse.

lately i have been having a reality check with how people really neglect their health. i had one patient who had hypertension [which is usually preventable by diet and exercise in the first place], so his doctor prescribed him medication for it. he was noncompliant with his medication for whatever reason, i'm assuming he just didn't think he needed it. when i had him he had just gotten a peritoneal dialysis catheter placement, he had gone into End Stage Renal Disease and was now having to receive dialysis three times a week. all because he did not take care of his body and did not follow medical advice. he learned his lesson the hard way. he was young. i told him it was not too late and he can turn his life around. i tried my best to teach him how.

another patient i had the other night had a history of type II diabetes. type II adult onset diabetes is usually preventable through diet & exercise as well. i know it can be hereditary, but is much more set on by lack of a healthy lifestyle [which is as foreign as chinese to a surprisingly good amount of people]. this patient was morbidly obese, and when i was taking care of her she had just had her right leg amputated above the knee. why? because she had developed ulcers on her legs, which does happen with diabetics, but can often be prevented from getting so bad they have to amputate, by seeing a doctor regularly and taking care of herself the best she can: loosing weight, being active, etc. this woman was relatively young as well, but she was wearing a diaper and could not even clean herself. she was completely helpless and looking ahead to sedentary life of poor health and inactivity. all this because she did not take care of her health.

it is so sad to see patients like this. a percentage of my patients have extensive medical histories, oftentimes every single disease they suffer from is preventable. [high blood pressure, high cholesterol, COPD, shortness of breath, need for a CPAP/BiPAP because they have an extra one hundred pounds weighing down their lungs, kidney failure, heart attack, stroke, heart failure, and a surgical history of double and triple bypasses]. let me clarify: these diseases and ailments are not always preventable, i know that. but in the cases of many, they are.

please evaluate your lifestyle. now is the time to prevent and protect your health. check your blood pressure often, keep it less than 120/80. monitor your weight/BMI. study diseases like diabetes, know the symptoms. be aware of your health so you can recognize symptoms, so you can prevent not treat. be active every day. it is crucially vital to your health. stop eating "manufactured edible products" with enriched white flour and high fructose corn syrup and ingredients you can't even pronounce. eat FOOD. eat foods that are made in a kitchen, not a laboratory. eat fruit. eat chicken. eat fish. eat vegetables. drink water. it is simple if you let it be! please, help yourself.

finishers wanted.

summer youth conference was held at troy, university and stakes from all over the area meet for it. there were 600 youth there! [even some from georgia&mississippi]. it turned out great, the kids all loved it & i know it was a testimony builder for them. i got to go since i am first counselor in the young womens [there are 2 girls in my YW]. i got home from work on thursday morning with the bishop waiting for me at my house, we drove straight to troy [3 hours], and i was up all day, besides the 2 hours i ditched out on the workshops. after 30 hours of being awake i was just not feeling right in the head to stay the least.

we had really awesome workshops, two dances [i'll get to those], a service project, and lots of firesides/devotionals. we were staying in the dorms so we ate at the college cafeteria, which was fun. dan came up on friday evening, i was so happy to have him there with me! on saturday morning we had a 5K. as i've mentioned, my ankle is injured and i can't run, but i got excited and ran for a while anyways, and then dan ended up carrying me half the way since my foot was hurting so bad. but we made it! we slept most of the car ride home, and then i had work again saturday night... ouch!

we had a dance friday and saturday night. i absolutely love the youth dances. they are so entertaining. either my girls wanted me out there to dance with them or i couldn't resist during single ladies, so i was out on the dance floor the whole time. i learned my lesson last dance, do not give the impression you are single in any way or some sweet 16-year old boy will ask me to dance. the girls were nervous so i was out there dancing with them, and then as soon as a slow song would come on i would run off the dance floor. i still managed to get asked to dance a few times, and it is the worst for the boys. they get the most horrified look on their face& feel soo awkward, poor boys. i just don't know how to differentiate myself. it so painfully awkward to watch the kids. i dubbed myself 'the encourager' and helped the boys get the courage to ask a girl. the boys would just wander around aimlessly so i would help them find a girl or put a girl&boy together... all they need is a little encouragement! and then once they are paired up they are the giddiest souls with the biggest grins on their faces. this is by far one of the best parts of my calling.
cutest ciara
these are my girls/dancing buddies
bishop wyatt and his daughter katlin, who looks so beautiful:]
the troy fountain
the scene babies
the cute boy who wore a tux
they were pop, lock, &droppin it
we are the cutest awkward 15-year old couple, i finally had someone to dance with!
my number was almost 143, more marathon pictures to come :]
here are the youth in our ward: me, aubrey [miamaid president &only miamaid] aly [YW president] kaitlin [laurel president &only laurel], then the boys...
we love each other and we love troy.


bear bryant

bear bryant has a .84 win record.

he won 323 games, lost 46 during his 25 year tenure as head coach of university of alabama, starting in 1945.

he led alabama to 6 national championships and 13 conference championships.

he's totally legendary, little did he know he was making history with that houndstooth hat. never looked so good on anybody.

[notice the price]

we love free admission day at the bear bryant museum!


"let freedom riiiing..."

our 4th of july was very different than any we have had in the past. usually it is filled with lots of family&friends! this year it was down to the basics, him&her was all we really needed. the 4th of july two years ago was when dan and i got lost together at rigby lake, he wow-ed me with his rock skipping skills, &we held hands for the first time at the idaho falls firework show!

i worked the night of the 3rd &was a seriously tired MESS. we went to church, loved the patriotic songs in sacrament meeting with the gusto organ player, loved our little ward, drove home karin &the missionaries. got home&we fell asleep [dan was keeping me company:], &i woke up to a beautiful home-cooked meal dan made for me! steak, biscuits, corn, parmesan potato wedges, &pink lemonade- pretty good american meal right there!

we then played a game of LIFE [rolltidedan vs rachamajama], had some pink lemonade ice cream shakes [dan's delicious creation] made rice krispie treats in the utmost patriotic way, played uno, &dan played me some songs of the guitar. it was the greatest night with the couches pushed up against the walls and a big blanket on the floor, we love just cuddling and laughing and playing:]. we then headed off to see the firework display at sokol park, we found it just in time. it's extremely difficult trying to find a place to watch fireworks on land with no elevations and dense overgrown trees everywhere... never had that problem out west! we tuned into the radio&enjoyed the show. on the way home my phone rang&i got called off work [if the census at the hospital is low, they call of a nurse or two so they're not "overstaffed" or paying more nurses than they need. i happily obliged& we continued our night! we watched band of brothers, and continued to eat the entire united states in order of states we didn't care as much for to our favorites. we left california, nevada, idaho, &alabama for last.

i am so thankful for those men who fought for the freedom of their families& their countries. they truly are heroes and will always be remembered. i respect and love deeply my own grandfathers and forever grateful to them for their sacrifices and what they gave up so i can enjoy the life i have today. i will always honor&remember them throughout my life and teach my children so they know and are grateful for the events that took place in the history of our country. regardless of our countries lack of God-fearing leadership & massive economical problems, we still live in the greatest land and must always we proud of and thankful for that!


"the best things in life are free" {or almost}

that's my dad's best advice, &it is so true! we had the BEST little date night in our living room! dan got a tent for his birthday from his sweet parents so we set it up in the living room and filled it with pillows&blankets. dan made the most delicious shake with fresh strawberries&blueberries &homemade ice cream. it was so fresh, all natural sweetness, mostly just really divine. we topped it off with some ten things i hate about you. dan hadn't seen it since middle school. it was so fun to reminisce ["have you heard of save ferris??"]. we think joseph gordon-levitt is the cutest/our favorite [500 days of summer].

the next night we took a few of our spare laundry quarters and headed to the movie theatre for some arcade games! dan rocked at the racing game, he got first. he also won air hockey, but he would let me catch up every few points to make the game last longer. we felt like middle schoolers again.